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Posted: Tue Nov 27, 2012 2:12 pm 
Radio-KOL DJ
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Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2005 5:00 am
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Location: Northern Woods
At the request of SeedyRom, and with apologies to the clown lovers and mime haters out there (why? Por que? Pour qoui?)...*shudder* Yes, while I'm terrified of clowns, I love mimes. they are so..French!

I have allergies. I have all my life but they were worse when I was little. When I was around 5 or so they told me I was allergic to eggs. It really didn’t seem to mean more than no eggs or mayonnaise (which I hated anyway). But shortly after that, my mother brought me to a McDonalds for a kids show. I remember it very clearly because I wasn't allowed to eat there as a kid. On the contrary, we usually went to places where you could get a waitress to bring you food, and a beer with your burger.

On this particular day, they were having a live Ronald McDonald show. Now as much as I hate clowns, Mumsy loved them. So she wanted to have me see a clown show (personally I don't believe any clown shows are G-rated, if you know what I mean). I don't remember where we were other than it had involved a doctor and some blood tests, but I was promised a surprise, and the clown show was it. Um, sure, and I still couldn't have more than a orange drink there either.

At one point Ronald asked for volunteers from the audience. Now, my mom was hot. Super hot in those days. So when I half heartedly raised my hand at my mother's urging, he of course picked me. Stuff like that happened all the time anyway. So I was the chosen one. and was sitting on the stool facing the audience.

Ronald proceeded to blindfold me, making me a bit scared. As I was telling myself the clown wouldn't hurt me, I felt what seemed to be an egg cracked over my head. And in my child's mind...that clown was trying to kill me. I was allergic to eggs! Obviously he did that trick where you pretend to crack an egg on someone's head, but I wasn't aware of the trick and panicked. I spun on that stool and with all the force in my child's legs kicked him in the groin with both feet. As HARD as I could (and I'm *quite* long legged). He made some awful noise and dropped to the ground, curled up in a foetal ball.

As I was dragged screaming away from this monster that tried ot kill me, I remember thinking I should have known because that garish greasepaint was like a warning label. And to this day I still am scared to violence by clowns.

~ Laureth

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Posted: Wed Nov 28, 2012 6:03 pm 
Radio-KOL DJ
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Joined: Fri Feb 11, 2005 5:00 am
Posts: 720
Location: Ottawa, Ontario
That is easily horrifying and hilarious. I don't know how to feel about it.


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Posted: Thu Nov 29, 2012 8:12 pm 
Radio-KOL DJ
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Joined: Thu Feb 03, 2005 5:00 am
Posts: 368
Location: Northern Woods
To be fair, years later I'm somewhat embarrassed by it. But I'm still terrified of clowns. Once I was with an ex-bf and we saw a clown in the store and I hid till it left!

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Primum vivere, deinde philosophari!

A DJ is ME!


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