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Amplitude at the Grand Canyon

 Show Name:  Radio Free Jerey, Bitch! 
 Prize Multi:  RFJB Prize Hobot 

 Age:  34 
 Sex:  Male 
 Location:  Mesa, AZ 
 Twitter:  Not Provided 

Show Times:
See Schedule


Who's Amplitude?

Amplitude is the current Station Director of Radio KOL and the host of "Radio Free Jersey, Bitch!" broadcasting live from The Radio KOL Home Office in Mesa, AZ. Wednesday and Thursday mornings 12 AM to 2 AM EST (10 PM to 12 AM Arizona time.)


How Did Amplitude Get Involved in Radio KOL?

Amplitude began playing Kingdom of Loathing on July 13, 2004, after reading about it in a friends' Livejournal (LdySaphyre #143610.) Not long after beginning his KOL career, Ampy began listening to Radio KOL, and tuned in to hear Eyespeculum and The Big Meat Show religiously. Having had his own radio show while in college (WRNU Rutgers University-Newark) and also having had a two year internship with The Howard Stern Show, Amp was enamored with the idea of having a show on Radio KOL. He submitted an audition and was hired by Eyespeculum in August of '04. However, at the time there wasn't a time slot available for Amp, and his first show didn't air until September 8th, 2004. Amp's first show was wrought with technical difficulties and he went on an hour late because he couldn't connect to the streams. It was a messy start to an interesting Radio KOL career.

Trainwreck Radio

Trainwreck Radio was a more talk than music based show featuring Amplitude and c00c00c00. It aired Monday, Wednesday, and Thurdsay from October '04 to May of '05. Topics of conversation were usually taboo in nature. c00 would often make Amp sing ridiculous pop songs. Several times c00's mother appeared on the show, and Amp would mercilessly hit on her. Perhaps the most famous Trainwreck Radio show was the infamous Power Hour, where Amp, c00, Dazz, Sacr0w, and Riboflavin drank a shot of beer a minute for 60 minutes, and then continued to do shots of beer until... well.. Amp and Dazz ran out of beer. Amp is still to this day constantly asked when he will be doing another Power Hour show. The Power Hour show is available for download on Coldfront. Trainwreck Radio ended when Amp and c00 got bored of doing it, however, once in a while c00 will get in touch with Amp and they'll do a reunion show. Hilarity then ensues.

Radio Free Jersey, Bitch!

What is Radio Free Jersey, Bitch!?

After Trainwreck ceased to be, Amp created Radio Free Jersey, Bitch! The show centers around Alternative and Rock music, and Amp's amusing stories and anecdotes.

Requests and Contacting Amplitude during the Show

Amplitude accepts requests at Be forewarned, requests that displease Amp will rapidly receive "The Shotty" that is to say, the song will not be played to completion, but end rather abruptly in grisly fashion. If you'd like to get in touch with Amp, you can use that address, as well as an in game K-Mail or blue message. Sending Amplitude AIM's during the show is generally frowned upon by Amp unless you are already on his contact list.


Amplitude usually runs two contests a day. The contests are trivia based. Contestants must submit answers via blue message in chat. Amplitude accepts multiple entries during the contests, however, spamming is not tolerated. Five full seconds between answer submissions is a safe rule of thumb. Spammers will be disqualified. Amplitude's final contest of the day is the infamous Big Package. The Big Package contains a slew of nifty and valuable prizes as well as a significant amount of meat. Contests are funded by listener donations. If you wish to make a donation for Amp's contests, please do so by sending it to Amp's prize multi, RFJB Prize Hobot (#533611).

Listener Interaction

Amplitude loves interacting with the listeners while on air. He encourages your submission of questions, stories, and etc. via the Gmail address. Occasionally, Amplitude will play "Ask Uncle Ampy" when listeners can ask Amp anything they want. Amplitude also likes to play Fun With Amp's Voicemail, where listeners call Amp's cell phone and leave messages to be played on air.


Occasionally, Amp will do a theme show, but usually these occur spontaneously on the fly. Past themes have included Buttrock shows (80's hair bands and metal,) Buttpop shows (80's new wave,) Swing Music, Rat Pack stuff, All Acoustic, Classical, and Amp's personal favorite "Songs From Bands Who's Lead Singers Have Kicked The Bucket" (it's wordy, but fun!.)

Bump Submissions

Amp wants your bumps! Feel free to record something for Radio Free Jersey, Bitch, anything you want, and send it to If you'd like to submit a show intro, record yourself saying the following. "Broadcasting live from the Radio KOL Home Office in, Mesa, AZ, it's Radio Free Jersey Bitch and I'm your announcer (insert your name,) now introducing your host (insert witty comment here) Amplitude!" Send Amplitude the file (voice only, no music) and he'll take care of the production work.

Listener Comments

ampcolorfinal.jpg Harvey Cocksweller:

Welcome to the bio for DJ Amplitude. Amplitude (often called "Amp" by his fans and loyal listeners) broadcasts from the attitude capital of the world, New Jersey-- and it shows. Amplitude's show contains coarse language, sexual dialogue, and loads of suggestive innuendo. Amp generally plays a variety of rock music, spanning from 80's hair bands (referred to as "Butt-rock") to modern alternative, metal, and punk-- and of course, his favorite band, Nine Inch Nails. In fact, he starts each of his shows with a Nine Inch Nails song that he chooses on a whim. Amp is a very humorous DJ, and takes the time to entertain his listeners. He shares stories about his experiences with other Kingdom of Loathing players, his dog, and any other funny events in his life. He is very thoughtful as well, as he often sings a special birthday song for his fans on their birthdays. He will occasionally bring guests on his show and chat with them, or play various gameshow-type games with them on the air. Amplitude holds giveaways on each of his shows, the most well-known one being his "Big Package", which is generally chock-full of valuable KoL items and meat. Listeners seem to do anything to get their hands on Amp's Big Package. Amplitude's show, "Radio Free Jersey Bitch" has a loyal fanbase that's usually in the radio chat channel, being social as they enjoy his show together. Amplitude can usually be found chatting with the fans in that channel as well.

A notable division of Amp's fanbase is known as the "Ampli-cuties", consisting of several lovely females though there are equally as many males that listen to the show as well. Amplitude takes requests, and responds to them promptly. However, if your request is terrible, he will quickly shoot it with a barrage of machine guns and bombs, killing it immediately. Amp gives on-air credit for all donations he receives for radio giveaways. Donations are what keeps the contests going, so if you can afford it, spread the wealth. If you haven't listened to Radio Free Jersey Bitch with Amplitude, you're missing out. Tune in and get ready for great music, and lots of fun and humor. Radio Free Jersey Bitch!

Scarlett (aka UberAmplicutie):

Amplitude, the Pimp Daddy of KoL Radio, can be summed up in three words, Hot, Heavy, and well, HOT. With contests aplenty and schwerve that goes on for miles, this Dj is a giver…boy he can give and give…. Rock is his weapon of choice, but he is not opposed to taking requests…beware the shotty! for those requests that offend his ears will die…. Be prepared for vast amounts of sexual innuendo and plenty of blatant , balls to the wall, no holds barred, hardcore, heterosexual MAN! With a vast amount of Hot AmpliCuties, and an equally vast amount of AmpliManiacs, this DJ will rock you and roll you all morning long.


Amplitude is the bastard son of Satan. He dominates Radio Kol with his "Radio Free Jersey Bitch" show. Of all of the DJs amplitude is assuredly the most unique. His attitude, his ego, and his package are what he is all about. Ask for a crappy song and he does not hesitate to shoot you down with a blaze of fire and lead. His harem of amplicuties follow him to the ends of the earth. He is a foul mouthed pseudo-jackass who isn't afraid to speak what is on mind. If everyone acted like the amplitude, there would either be an apocalypse or a utopia, probably an apocalypse. Amplitude throws caution to the wind and marches to the beat of his own drum. The badass attitude, the enormous balls, and the sensual package are what make amplitude not a man, but rather a god. Piss him off and he shall smite your soul into eternal darkness and bring pain and suffering to your family. Worship him and you simply get cursed at. Feel his power and bow before the greatness that is amplitude.

Hank Rocks

It is rumored- by idiots- that wombatilim and amplitude are the same person.


Residing in the great state of New Jersey (attitude capital of the world, the #1 producer of Egg Plant in America and boasting the largest petroleum containment facilities outside of the Middle East), Amplitude is a DJ who is not afraid to show off his Big Package, fling a few choice curse words and introduce the world to Gilligan... On his show, you are guaranteed choice NIN hits and a variety of Butt-rock classics. Amplitude will entertain requests, but be forewarned, be your request suck... it will be shot with extreme prejudice.


Amplitude (Homo urectum) Lives in the wilds of New Jersey; landfill of the New York jungle. Can be identified by his "Radio Free Jersey Bitch!" mating call. An often foul mouth and short tempered species of the DJ family. Many consider this particular member to be the leader of all the DJ species in the Radio KoL environment. Sinister by nature, this animal looks for any excuse to attack a person. Feeds mainly off of n00bs and beautiful women although it is becoming more clear now that women are merely used for entertainment and not actually prey upon. Beware should you come across this species and hear it begin to curse as this is a sign of impending danger, especially for you. This species is also very protective of its young, known as a "package." If ever encountered, one should smile and be friendly until the Amplitude has tired and leaves, however this usually takes several hours to happen.

Links and Other Miscellaneous Crap

Amplitude's Facebook
Amplitude's Myspace (Rarely Checked or Used)
Amplitude's Livejournal (Also Rarely Checked or Used)
Amplitude's Photobucket
ADeadHeart's Interview With Amplitude

Image by SenorRandom

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